我的继坶我的性老师

*Eh, Marigold did say she might be overly harsh because I was the first contestant… but if I had to guess? I lost a bunch of points in power and appearance. I mean, it just looks like a normal garden hoe. Black metal handle, and not like \'cool\' black but more of a dirty grey, and a standard wooden handle. I\'d say that\'s where I lost points.*

[Huh… ok that\'s actually a good point. It means I might have a better shot then I thought.]

*Oh? What did you pick out?*

[Now now Kat. No spoilers just yet.] Kat just gave Lily a kiss on the cheek instead of responding. Used the chance to lean against Kat and snuggle into her side. Lily also said a short prayer to Marigold that she wouldn\'t be chosen next…

"Right, Bonas you\'re up!" said Marigold. Lily let out a breath of air at the announcement. [Looks like I get to spend a bit more time cuddle up against you. I\'m glad for that!]

Bonas the wolf girl strode up towards Marigold, completely ignoring the elf\'s seductive looks. "Thanks for inviting me to the contest Marigold… but I don\'t know if I\'ll do well. I managed to find a dagger called \'The Awesome sword of Awesomeness\'" Marigold, Lily and Kat all snickered at the name.

"And it\'s a jewel encrusted gold dagger that heals people when you stab them… but doesn\'t heal the stab wound you need to make to use it,"

Marigold burst out into cackles. "Oh that\'s good. I mean… I\'m gonna need a picture?" Thyme was clearly listening because another picture appeared from thin air. "Yeah that\'s pretty snazzy alright. Hmm… not sure the joke is better then Kat\'s… but I DID laugh so I guess that settles that. I\'m going to give you…

"Hmm… I\'m torn. So I\'ve definitely got to give you points for the name and the fact that I laughed. Practicality might be horrible, because either you still end up with a stab wound, or you\'re me and you don\'t need it anyway… still it sounds pretty powerful. Bit gaudy but eh, I\'m a princess.

"I\'m going to give you… eighteen as your final score," said Marigold as she took the picture of the dagger and hid it between her boobs, keeping an eye on Bonas for her reaction. Sadly for Marigold, Bonas didn\'t seem at all interested in the movement. The wolf girl just gave a lazy salute as she turned back to her spot. "Right well, next up is Burgandy!"

Burgandy sighed and stood up. "I didn\'t find anything great… so I\'m hoping for ironic. I found this \'Mood Ring\' that latches onto people and continues to pump adrenaline into their system while trying to make them angry,"

"I like it… I like it… but not very practical?" offered Marigold.

"Eh you say that… but check the picture," responded Burgandy.

Marigold raised an eyebrow at that and snatched the photo out of the air without looking. Granted Thyme had been summoning them into the same spot, but the timing was pretty good… assuming Thyme didn\'t ensure the timing was perfect anyway. "Huh… that… that\'s a ring?"

"Apparently," said Burgandy.

"For fucking want a giant?" asked Marigold rhetorically as she showed the picture to the crowd. The ring in the display case was more than large enough to fit around Kat\'s waist and then some. *Wait… I know it wasn\'t in the description but do you think it also tries to catch the persons arms?*

[I can see it.] "Well I do give you points for admitting to your problems," said Marigold. Burgandy just grunted a bit in response. "Ultimately, I\'m gonna give this… hmm… maybe a twelve? It looks nice but I really don\'t know how practical it is and it\'s not THAT amusing. Potentially powerful though. If it works on people stronger then you.

An angry opponent is a dumb opponent,"

Burgandy shrugged and headed back to her seat seemingly not all that mad about not finding something good for the contest. Kat was a little annoyed that Burgandy managed to be just one point off with such a lacklustre treasure. At least, in her estimation. "Willow you\'re up next!" shouted Marigold.

Willow slid up into the spotlight and let out a sigh. "I regret having found this. In fact, I really wish I didn\'t find this… but even though I didn\'t spend much time with you over the tournament… I know what you\'re like. Do I HAVE to say it out loud though?"

"Hmm…" Marigold drew out the sound. "I\'m gonna say yes. This is mostly for amusement after all. Plus, why should you get a prize if you\'re not even willing to embarrass yourself a bit?"

"Urgh fine. I find a canteen that instead of water has infinite lube. It\'s called \'The Slipper Solution\' now please let me sit down," grumbled Willow.

"Dammit I wish I\'d have found that!" laughed Vanya. "With a better delivery of the name and what it does I\'m pretty sure I could\'ve won with that answer!"

"I find it rather… surprising that time would put something like that in amongst the random treasures…" added Bonas.

"Eh… I don\'t know about that… though from what I\'m reading sadly it\'s not rated for the type of stuff I find fun. It seems like it\'s meant for machines. Sure it\'s a lubricant but it also seems to be a de-rusting agent and maybe a one that protects from rust a bit afterwards? Hard to say based on the description. Naughty Willow automatically going for something sexual," chided Marigold.

500

"Look, just give me my points so I can sit down in shame…" mumbled Willow.

"Alright, alright I won\'t stretch this on too long even though I know I want to. So… very funny in concept but you butchered the delivery. It\'s also not that funny once you\'ve got the details and it\'s not powerful at all. Plus it doesn\'t really look like anything… failing grades here all around… assuming it\'s not practical.

It just might be… but Romilda refused… I mean, a certain female dwarf who won\'t be named refused to join in so I can\'t say if it\'s practical or not… so… four points," stated Marigold.

"Urgh, why did I even pick that?" whined Willow as she slumped back down into a beanbag, paused for a moment, then grabbed another beanbag to put over herself. "I guess I\'ll just hide out like this so I can\'t see your faces. It\'s not like this is any more embarrassing then the treasure I had to announce,"

"Cool… cool… Blue what have you got for me?" asked Marigold.

"I find a harp that forces anyone who hears its music to dance in a conga line," answered Blue as she stood up and handed over her answers.

"Oof, ok points for amusement but points OFF because this doesn\'t specify that the user of it is safe… and I\'m willing to bet I know what this harp is a copy of. If I\'m right then yeah… totally works on the person playing it," mumbled Marigold.

"Wait really? That\'s stupid!" shouted Blue.

"Yeah it is, but points for the joke. I\'d explain it… but eh I don\'t want to keep you guys forever and it is a fairly long story. Anyway… it IS a beautiful looking harp so top marks there… practical pretty low and amassment high. Power level? Hmm… doubt it\'s on the originals level so… I\'ll give you a seventeen!" said Marigold. "Praise my generosity!"

*Ok now I\'m a touch annoyed. I actually saw that harp and decided not to go along with it.* Lily was about to respond to Kat\'s complaint when Marigold said "Lily! You\'re up!"

Lily nervously pulled herself away from Kat and said, "I went with a treasure that I knew after not really finding anything… and it\'s funny enough I think. It\'s the \'Lightning Rod\'. If you remember I tried to use it against Blue and it did not go all that well…"

"Oh yeah… not practical underwater but… huh it could be really fun for me at least," said Marigold as she looked over the details and the picture. "Solid, but not quite good enough. So… I\'ll give you thirteen points like Kat. That way you can match!"

"Vanya, last but not least! Can you dethrone the Awesome sword of Awesomeness?" asked Marigold.

Vanya shrugged and said, "Probably not but I did find this! Thread that when worn against the body makes it look like you aren\'t wearing anything. So you can wear good silk armour into battle while making it look like nothing,"

"Ooh, tempting. Might see how much that\'s going for… but not practical for most people and it\'ll be invisible so it doesn\'t look nice. Powerful? Not really. Imma give it… a ten. That means Bonas is the winner!

Here\'s your prize!"

Marigold clicked her fingers and snatched some cloth that appeared in midair. Unrolling it revealed a t-shirt that said \'I completed a royal\'s request but all I got was this shitty t-shirt\' printed on it.